Exclusive early release! My new book, "The Sand of Time. Book of Flame. Volume 2", is coming March 10 to major retailers, but the ebook is available NOW at
https://www.smashwords.com/books/presale/1058256
I live in Russia, write the truth and compose fantasies about love my books 18+, there is cruelty, sex, violence
Exclusive early release! My new book, "The Sand of Time. Book of Flame. Volume 2", is coming March 10 to major retailers, but the ebook is available NOW at
https://www.smashwords.com/books/presale/1058256
The car stopped on a large farm. As it turned out later, his distant relative was the director of a stud farm, which was located nearby. From that moment on, Kai practically lived in the stable. He "got sick" with horses. Once he went inside and inhaled the smell of manure, fresh hay, and warmth from horses, he "became infected" with them for life. He did everything in the stable: cleaned up manure, took out dirty sawdust, handed out hay, cleaned old disheveled horse equipment, looked after the horses.
A relative,
seeing his desire to work, did not interfere with this. He was warned that this
was a difficult teenager, but he saw a teenager in front of him who worked
tirelessly from dawn to dusk. And when Kai asked for permission to ride on
horseback, he was allowed for his labors, without even becoming to find out
whether he could ride or not.
Kai did not
know how, but he saw how others were riding, and carefully watched them, their
actions on horseback. He had already learned how to saddle and unsaddle horses,
giving them to the workers for the ride and taking them afterward.
Therefore,
now, having saddled the horse that he liked the most, he led out into the yard
and deftly jumped into the saddle. The horse he had chosen was not yet broken,
it had only been accustomed to the saddle, no one had ever sat on it. Seeing
Kai riding an unbroken horse, people ran to him from all sides, but it was too
late to warn him. Now everyone was watching what was happening, or rather,
waiting for the boy to fall off his horse.
The horse,
feeling for the first time the weight of the rider on its back, first froze in
surprise, and then began to apply all the means at its disposal to get rid of
Kai. The horse spun in place, backed up, stood on its hind legs times, and even
walked forward in such a way, apparently waiting for the rider to
"unfasten" from it. But the rider remained in the saddle. Then the
horse began to rush about the yard, suddenly throwing itself in one direction
or the other, then he stopped and kicked with its hind legs - again the same
result, the rider was on it.
Kai not only
watched the riders but also listened carefully to conversations about what to
do if a horse tries to throw off a man. He realized: he needed to force the
horse to run forward, then it would not have the opportunity to throw him out
of the saddle like that, and gradually, having spent part of the accumulated
energy, it would become calmer.
Keeping all
this in mind, Kai squeezed his legs and began to actively hit the rear of his
sneakers on the side of the horse. And the horse heard him - rushed forward. In
front of them, there was a pole blocking the exit from the stable into the
field. The horse easily jumped over it. And they dashed off into the distance.
All who watched
this were standing in amazement. The boy did not fall, although the struggle
was serious. He stayed on the horse!
"He will
fall down there," said the watchman, spitting angrily to the side.
The pale and
frightened director of the plant, who came running to the noise, thought with
horror that he would now tell his parents.
Kai
"flew" over the steppe - there was speed, wind in the face, and the
feeling of freedom. He was not afraid. He slipped the end of the rein under his
knee so that he would not slip into the legs of the galloping horse, and spread
his arms to the sides. Now it was the full feeling of flight! He remembered
this for the rest of his life - a horse galloping under him and a space of air
flying towards him with the aromas of herbs and flowers.
They returned
at a walk. The horse was young and, injecting all the adrenaline, was tired.
Kai sensed it and didn't make it move faster. Now they had a complete
understanding - he was walking on it, practically giving up the reins, and
watched the scenery passing by from the back of the horse. Oh, how wonderful it
was. Indeed, the Arab proverb is right that heaven on earth can be found on the
back of a horse.
Their
appearance was noticed from afar; everyone again ran into the yard. The
teenager calmly on horseback went inside the yard and dismounted.
"Well
done!" finally, the chief brigadier in charge of driving the horses could
not stand it and, enthusiastically rushing to him, shouted, "Mikhalych,
can we take him as our assistants? We thought there would be a fuss with this
horse for a month, a very characteristic horse. Look, the guy made an agreement
with it in two hours."
Mikhalych -
this was exactly the director of the plant, he made a stern face:
"What if
the boy is killed or injured? I have to answer in front of his family!"
"Please,
let me help with the horses!" almost shouted Kai, not even expecting to be
offered this.
The radiant
eyes of a teenager, glowing with green sparks, looked at Mikhalych. Well, he
had never seen such eyes. Mikhalych muttered something else just for show, but
then said to obey the senior brigadier and not show any personal initiative!
From that
moment on, Kai's life became like a fairy tale. He was happy! He was infinitely
happy here. There was nothing here to remind him of his life in
Everything was
saturated with freedom: this air, this endless distance, the steppes dissolving
in the haze of the horizon, and the horses, they were free and gave him this
freedom.
His physical
fitness and the fact that from early childhood he trained so actively, helped
him to master the art of riding. Although he had to fall, his body drew the
knees up to the chest, and he quickly got to his feet, receiving only minor
bruises and injuries.
Horses feel the
rider, and they felt that this rider was not afraid. They felt his inner
strength and obeyed him. Not immediately, because they were free, but, falling
under his iron will, they obeyed. Only free creatures can make a choice and
serve someone who has the same inner strength and the same desire for freedom
as they do.
So his summer
flew by. It was the happiest summer of his life. Kai had been there for two
more summers in a row. But when the parents found out that their son was happy
there, and most importantly, free, everything stopped. It was decided to send
him for the summer to a teenage military camp for his education and training.
So his summer of freedom and flight over the steppe turned into a
"prison" and a barracks. But that was later ...
***
Now, entering
their apartment from the dank street, he felt warmth. The smell of an old
communal apartment hit the nose, such a unique smell of old walls and people
who lived here. Leaving his wet jacket on a hanger in the hallway, he headed to
their main room.
Prokhor, upon
Kai's appearance, got up, as always went to meet him. They hugged.
"Sit down,
we are discussing one thing here," Prokhor waved in the direction of the
chair, and then returned to the conversation interrupted by his appearance.
Not only
Prokhor had changed and matured, but Kai had also changed. Now he was a short,
skinny teenager with a shock of curly resinous hair that always fell over his
forehead. His handsome, noble features were eye-catching. But the most amazing
thing about him was his eyes - large, expressive, the color of a precious
emerald, framed by long eyelashes. No, there was no feminine beauty in his
features, it was the beauty of a teenager, although the softness and smoothness
of his movements gave his appearance certain femininity. But this was only a
deception for those who did not know him. His flexible, plastic movements were
mistaken for weakness, and this was his strength. Possessing combat techniques,
he moved like a panther, softly and silently. But when a fight broke out, his
opponents flew in different directions. It seemed that he had no equal in this.
He never lost a fight to anyone. There were already legends about him. Any
stick in his hand turned into a formidable weapon. And now, like a cat,
slipping flexibly into his chair, Kai drew admiring glances with the elegance
of his movements. He didn't do it on purpose, it was his nature. They looked at
him with admiration and envy.
Having
finished planning today's night raid, the purpose of which was to knock out
money from the debtor, everyone went about their business. There was still a
lot of time before leaving, several guys went to the kitchen to cook some food.
Now their "affairs" were more serious, and they had money in the
"common fund" for normal food and alcohol.
Kai did not
like these Prokhor's cases, or rather, internally did not approve, but was
always with him everywhere. After all, this was his friend.
Sitting on the
sofa, he tried to relax, leaning back, and throw out of the head another
lecture of his parents about his behavior.
"What? Did
they again rinse the brains at home?" Prokhor could guess even without
asking this question to his friend, seeing his face now. He sat down next to
him.
"It's
okay," Kai looked absently into the space in front of him.
Prokhor
respected him for this. His friend never whined, never complained. And no
matter if it was mental or physical, he always said: "Everything is
fine."
Prokhor turned
to him and asked, looking intently into his eyes:
"Have you
ever smoked?"
"No."
Prokhor smoked
for a long time, or rather, from the moment they met, he had already smoked.
Kai did not smoke. He didn't even know why, although now he had his own money,
earned by him on common business, and he could afford to buy cigarettes. But
such a thought did not occur to him.
Prokhor took
out a cigarette, lit it, and brought it to Kai's lips.
"Breathe
air through it. Try it."
Just as then,
in the basement, when Prokhor handed him a glass of vodka, he did not hesitate
to do what his friend said. He sucked in air, or rather, smoke. He coughed
immediately, his eyes stung.
While he was
clearing his throat, Prokhor was holding him by the shoulders, smoking a
cigarette himself and waiting for Kai to return to normal.
"Let's
continue," Prokhor again raised the cigarette to his lips. Kai took a
cigarette and inhaled, but not so hard. It turned out better. There was no
cough. He blew smoke out of himself.
"Did you
like it?" asked Prokhor, removing his hand from the shoulder.
"Do not
know yet."
From that day
on, he began to smoke and did not understand what, in fact, he should like and,
in general, what was the meaning of this action - to draw in the smoke and then
to exhale it.
Once, after a
very strong scandal with his parents, he went into the garden. It was winter.
Snowflakes were quietly falling from the starry sky. Kai tried to understand
why snowflakes fell on his face from the clear starry sky. They melted on his
cheeks, leaving traces as if from tears. But those weren't tears, he didn't cry
anymore - he swore he wouldn't cry anymore. His eyes were dry, only snowflakes
rolled down his cheeks, leaving wet paths. Kai looked into the sky and asked
the space of darkness above him just one question:
"Why don't
they love me?"
They again
explained to him what they expected from their son, how he should live and that
now he was living wrong - but they would achieve their goal, they would not
allow their family to be dishonored. Everyone in their family is military - and
their son must love it and live for this, in order to serve for the good of the
Motherland!
When he said
that for the good of the Motherland one could simply work or, for example,
engage in science, he was shamed for another hour by his girlish manners, and
not by the choice of a real man. But Kai, just starting to study chemistry,
realized that this was the passion of his life. He did not love any science as
much as chemistry. He did not even suspect that next to him there was a
parallel world - the world of atoms, trace elements, and everything else that
was just beginning to recognize. It captivated him headlong, and then he
realized that he was interested in this life. He wanted to become a scientist.
This was his dream.
Having told the
people closest to him about his dream, he opened his soul to them and as a
result got a thrashing. How painful it is when your family doesn't understand
you.
"His
family" - all this became just an empty word, the essence of this word had
long since disappeared.
Kai put his
hands in his pockets. A hand found a pack of cigarettes. It was cold, his
fingers were freezing and numb, but the physical cold was not so strong
compared to the cold inside. He wanted to see the warmth - a small flame at the
end of a cigarette. Striking a lighter, he lit a cigarette. Warm smoke filled
his lungs. The light of a cigarette flickered against the background of the
cold white snow. Above him, a huge sky with myriads of small cold stars
stretched. But now he felt warm. The warmth from this light warmed him in this
dead space that did not accept him.
And so their
lives went on. Kai came to Prokhor when he could, and was with them until they
locked him up at home again. Prokhor actively made his way in this life,
uniting around him more and more young people who were ready to be with him.
***
When they had
not moved from the basement, an incident occurred, after which Kai began to be
treated with even greater respect. In the fall their gang climbed into the
house closed by summer residents until spring. They had nothing to eat, and
they knew that in such houses there were always cereals, canned food, and
pickled products like cans of cucumbers and tomatoes. To get into such a house
meant to spend half of the winter without starving. And they made such an
action. Having broken the locks, they got inside. While swarming inside the
house, they heard the sound of a car approaching. The car stopped right at the
only entrance to the house - only from there they could get out. The windows in
the house were tightly shuttered - it was a trap. The lights came on and an
elderly man and woman entered. From their characteristic appearance, Kai
immediately guessed they were Japanese. Apparently, they rented this house for
living outside the city, not only for the summer but also for the fall. With
the lights on, the guys saw a fireplace and a fairly well-furnished interior of
the room.
Prokhor
prepared for a fight. Kai understood: Prokhor would out Herod. The guys also
froze in combat readiness, waiting for his command. The elderly couple froze in
surprise, not expecting to see them here. And then he greeted the newcomers in
Japanese, bowing politely in the traditional Japanese bow.
He was answered
by a man, also in Japanese. A conversation ensued between them.
All stood
still.
Then Kai turned
to Prokhor and said that they could take whatever food they needed and leave.
They could just walk away because the owner of the house did not mind sharing
food with them since they needed it.
The guys
silently collected their bags and left.
Kai said
goodbye, again bowed politely, and went out with Prokhor.
Walking along
the dark, cold streets to the basement, they began vying to ask him what
language he spoke, how he knew the language, and what the man answered to him.
Kai calmly replied that it was Japanese, that he was studying this language,
and the elderly man was native Japanese, and it was not customary to refuse
food to those in need there.
"And what
other language do you know?" with a mockery asked the guy going nearby.
"Many
different ones."
Prokhor stopped
and, turning Kai by the shoulders, said sternly:
"Why did
you hide it from me?! I must know everything about my people, especially about
you! And you hid it!" Prokhor shook him by the shoulders, and since he was
taller, now Kai stood on tiptoe, so tightly Prokhor held him.
"Besides
Japanese, I know English and French. Now I am studying German and I have also
begun to study Arabic ..." embarrassed, he said quietly. "Let me go,
please, it hurts."
Only now
Prokhor realized that he was holding his friend in a stranglehold for his
shoulders almost above the ground. He unclenched his hands.
Kai stepped
back from him.
"And what
did you think I had been doing when they locked me up at home? And also I can
sing," he angrily snapped to Prokhor for such an interrogation.
They walked in
silence towards the basement. Prokhor caught up with Kai, who was walking,
frowning, and was silent, and hugged him by the shoulders.
"Offended?
Come on! No offense. So why didn't you tell me that before?"
"I didn't
want to stand out - and without it, everyone thinks me different."
"You
always will be different, not like them. And they will always all envy you. Get
used to it."
"And
you?" he stopped and looked into Prokhor's eyes.
"You
didn't tell me that - were you afraid of offending me?" Kai averted his
eyes. "Silly, I'm proud of you!"
They went to
catch up with their comrades who had gone ahead.
"Well,
now, share your secret, how did you manage to learn so many languages?"
asked Prokhor as he walked.
"You know,
a Japanese man lives with us, a friend of my father. I began to speak Japanese
earlier than Russian," Kai smiled, remembering his childhood. "Mom
did not take care of my upbringing, they hired a French governess for me. She
has ancestors from the White Guards who have fled from
"And
German, Arabic?"
"My father
has insisted on German; he says it will come in handy in my profession. And I like
Arabic myself, and my parents are all for it, considering that knowledge of the
Muslim language will also be useful to me."
Prokhor did not
ask his friend about anything anymore, he was proud of him and was glad that
his friend was so extraordinary and talented.
In the evening,
after a sumptuous dinner, Prokhor solemnly announced to everyone that Kai would
now sing. Kai glared at him.
"Why are
you staring at me?! You've said yourself that you also sing. I am already
acquainted with you so much and have never heard you singing, and also the
boys," Prokhor said all this calmly, seeing how his friend
"boils". "Lads, where is the guitar?"
The guys
perked up when they heard this.
They brought a
guitar, shoved into Kai's hands. All the guys sat in a semicircle around him,
waiting for the concert. It was stupid to behave with false modesty. He,
quickly going over the songs in his mind, stopped at this one and began to
sing:
My fleet is of
two ships, it is true.
How can I sail
to your pier
Along fast
rivers of wanderings?
We are lost in
space. *
While he was
singing, Prokhor cast glances at him, thinking that he did not know that his
friend had such a voice.
"How cool
he is! It's good that we are friends. I'm proud of you!".
The chords died
down, the guys began to rustle, they began to demand more to sing. But Kai
flatly refused, saying another time.
Now they got
off his back, but then he sang for them at each of their gatherings, so his
singing and voice fascinated and attracted. The boys each time waited for his
concert, listened to his singing, and delighted in their souls. After all,
despite all the unsightly truth of their life that they led, their souls were
young and pure, they had not yet become completely cold-hearted.
***
Prokhor, as
an older brother, on the one hand, guarded and protected Kai from the cruelties
of this world, on the other hand, brought him into this world, realizing that
his friend would face it anyway. So let him know better from his friend and
under his control. So gradually Prokhor taught Kai to drink various alcoholic
beverages. He helped him to taste and understand their action and determine his
measure for himself. Once he allowed Kai to get drunk almost to the point of
losing his pulse, and the next day he walked gloatingly and mocked him, seeing
him, half-dead, with a terrible headache, lying on the bed.
Kai drew
conclusions from such experiments and discoveries. He learned the consequences
of excessive libation, which he did not like, and he did not like to lose
control of himself. Therefore, if he drank, then little and controlled what to
drink and how much.
He started
smoking after that incident in the winter when a warm light warmed his soul on
a cold winter night. But he also rarely smoked, only when he wanted to feel
again this warmth of the burning light at the end of the cigarette.
Now, having
matured, he spent more time in their apartment. Somehow, after another
successful case, the guys invited "girls" to celebrate their success.
Kai was present at such parties, but he was still considered small, therefore,
what the boys did with the girls, going to the next rooms, he only guessed from
the scattered information that he learned for himself on this question that was
beginning to worry him. He could emphasize all the information only from the
books in the library where he spent time. From the artworks read by him, he
understood only what happens unsaid by the authors of these works between a man
and a woman, when the doors are closed behind them and they are left alone.
Having tried to find the answer in the scientific and medical literature, he
learned about the physiology of this process and the difference between the
opposite sex. This was the end of his knowledge.
The party was
in full swing. Prokhor returned happy from the room where he was leaving with a
girl much older than him. With a sly smile on his face, he sat down next to Kai
on the sofa. This was the third time that Kai had seen this smile on Prokhor's
face. The first, when he gave him a glass of vodka for the first time to drink,
the second, when he brought a cigarette to his lips for the first puff in his
life, and now his friend had the same smile on his lips. Moreover, everyone
around was also whispering conspiratorially and exchanging glances.
Feeling a
conspiracy against himself, he jerked to get up from the sofa, but Prokhor's
strong hand on his shoulder held him in place.
Prokhor
laughed.
"Relax!
Why have you tensed?"
"And what
do you all have such faces?" Kai tried to get up again, but could not.
"Well,
here with the boys we have consulted and decided. You seem to be cooler than
all of us in a fight, but you are not a man yet. You haven't slept with a girl,
have you?" asked Prokhor and laughed. "Well, I do know, you haven't
slept!"
Everyone
laughed.
Kai frowned and
tried to get off the sofa again.
"Come on,
we do not want to offend. Everyone has had their first time. Today you will
have this for the first time."
Kai looked at
Prokhor distrustfully.
"Guys!
Pour a glass of cognac for the courage to a soldier!" ignoring Kai looking
at him, shouted Prokhor.
They brought
cognac.
"Drink!"
commanded Prokhor.
Kai drank.
"Now let's
go."
Prokhor got up
and, not letting go of his friend's shoulders, led him to the door, from which
he had recently left.
"Otherwise,
Marusya has already been tired to wait for you," with these words Prokhor
pushed him into the room and closed the door behind him.
There were
curtains in the room, and a floor lamp in the corner was burning. A half-naked
girl was sitting on a crumpled bed and smiled as she saw him stiffened as if
nailed to the floor.
The girl, still
smiling, pulled the shirt off her shoulders, and Kai saw her big full breasts.
Then she got up, the shirt slipped down, and, without lingering on her hips,
fell at her feet. What he saw in the picture in the medical anatomy handbook
now stood before him live. But unlike the book, it looked many times better.
The girl
approached. Her face was smeared with makeup, strips of mascara remained on her
cheeks, lipstick-stained part of her chin.
She took Kai's
hand and pulled him to the bed.
"Well,
hero, I'll do everything myself now," said Marusya, pushing him onto the
bed and stretching her hands to the belt of his jeans, "I like you for a
long time. You are so handsome! Sweetie!"
Kai felt her hands
under his jeans, threw back his head, and the ceiling began to disappear in his
mind. The incredible sensation covered him completely and then twisted his body
in a sweet spasm.
Catching his
breath and recovering a little, he opened his eyes and sat up on the bed. He
saw that Marusya was wiping her hands with napkins, and then, bending over him,
wiped the moisture that he felt inside his pants.
"For the
first time, it always happens so quickly. But don't worry. I'll teach you
everything," just as insidiously as Prokhor, smiled Marusya. "Eee! Do
not rush to leave, otherwise, these fools will laugh. You will be out in half
an hour so that they all would be envied."
Kai then did
not quite understand what she meant, but believed her and stayed. While he was waiting
for half an hour to pass, his young body recovered, Marusya noticed this and
decided not to postpone the teaching for a long time, but to continue right
now.
He left Marusya
in more than an hour. He was greeted with whoos and pops of opening champagne
bottles.
Clinking
glasses with him, a glass of champagne, Prokhor asked:
"Are you
glad?"
Kai averted his
eyes in embarrassment, perhaps now he had not even fully realized what had
happened to him, and therefore was not ready to discuss it.
Prokhor smiled,
seeing the detached, still hovering in the clouds, the face of his friend and
his pupils dilated from the pleasure received.
Then he met
Marusya several times, then there were other girls. Although for some reason he
did not like such girls, it was impossible to separate from the team, and now
he had to be a member of their private parties and entertainment.
***
Time passed.
Spring came in the world, so it seemed to Kai, he felt such a feeling of
renewal and rebirth of nature in himself that it seemed that the whole world
felt it and, like him, blossomed after a cold and dead winter.
He did not
like winter, or rather, he did not tolerate the cold very well. Although no one
knew about this, except for Prokhor, who saw how hard it was for Kai to spend
many hours in an ambush in the street. But his friend never complained and
always walked with Prokhor, even when he knew that they would spend several
hours on the frozen winter street. Then he came, sat down closer to the
radiator, and tried to draw from it the warmth that this cold haze, permeated
with stabbing snowflakes, took from him. Then Prokhor brought him hot tea, and
Kai, taking a cup from his friend's hands, warmed his soul with the warmth of
this cup and the warmth of Prokhor's friendship.
But now winter
was slowly dissolving in the rays of the warm sun. The snow was disappearing
from the streets of the city, leaving only mud and gurgling streams. The first
leaves appeared on the trees, but the main thing was warmth. The warmth came
from nature itself, from the air around. Kai loved spring! He loved this
warmth, which warmed his soul and gave him hope for a happy life. And this his adolescent
spring in his soul gave an aching feeling of something new, beautiful. Kai had
never felt such a feeling in his soul.
There was a
girl going in front of him on the sidewalk and suddenly a bag fell out of her
hands, one handle came off, and all its contents began to fall and scatter on
the asphalt.
Kai deftly
intercepted several oranges rolling to him and carried them to the girl, who
was trying to prevent all the products from falling out of the bag. He grabbed
the bag from the bottom, helping her with it. They both straightened up and
looked at each other. Her eyes were blue, like the spring sky above their heads.
"What
about him? How did he feel? What strange pleasant anxiety in the chest!"
he had never experienced such excitement before.
The girl was
saying something to him, and he only felt her hand under his, with which he
held the package, and looked into her eyes.
Finally, she
pulled her hand away and began to pick up the other products on the pavement.
"Let me
help you carry the package," he said.
"Okay,"
she replied, realizing that she couldn't handle it alone. She had to carry some
of the products separately herself, as they constantly fell out of the torn
bag.
They walked
side by side. Kai asked her about everything that seemed so important to him
now, she answered, reluctantly at first, but then began to speak calmly and
freely, as if she had known him for a long time.
On the way,
they cast furtive glances at each other. She had light blond hair, tied in a
braid that twisted like a beautiful golden snake down her back. The delicate
facial features of a teenage girl who was already crossing the line between a
teenager and a girl. She had a slim graceful figure and light flowing
movements. It turned out that she was studying at a ballet school, although she
didn't like it, the parents wanted her to study - it was so familiar to him.
Her name was
Anna, as she later seriously told him at parting.
Anna also cast
glances at the short young man walking next to her. For some reason, he
reminded her of a fairy-tale prince. She had not met such guys yet. This face,
curly resin hair down to his shoulders, and his eyes attracted her. If it were
not for those green eyes looking at her so mesmerized, she would never have
taken help from the unknown. Dressed in dark jeans, rough boots with thick
soles, a dark sweater with a hood, and a black leather jacket on top, he looked
unreal, and his name completed the image of a prince from a fairy tale. Can you
call an ordinary guy Kai? No! This could only be called the prince, who
happened to be on the streets of
Walking her to
the door of the apartment, Kai left the groceries on the rug, as she had asked
her parents not to see him, and, saying goodbye, left.
But the very
next day he waited for her return from the ballet school with a small bunch of
flowers in his hand.
So their meetings
began. Thus his first youthful love began. That was true love that happens only
once in a lifetime. It is love when the souls of two young creatures come into
contact with each other and acquire an incredible feeling of flying over this
world.
* Song:
Ocean. Alexander Geints and Sergey Danilov.
Damp and cold
made their way under the clothes - the teenager put his hands in his pockets
and, throwing the hood of his jacket over his wet hair, walked along the wet
sidewalk.
Why is he
haunted by this feeling that this is not his life, not his time, not his place,
not his city? Why? Maybe it all started from the moment when he realized that
everyone around him was distant from him? When he didn't become like all of
them. Kai glanced at the people running past.
He's different.
And if you are different, then you are an outcast. People don't need you. You
are internally rejected by everyone you know and love! But why? Why do people
close to you stop loving you just because you do not want to be the way they
want you to be?
His family:
dad, mom, his two elder brothers, and a sister. Why did the people closest to
him, the dearest to him in the world, move away from him? What did he do wrong?
He simply began to live, speak, and think as he saw fit. And they wanted him to
match the image they had created. They came up with a life for him to live.
Gradually, they
began to realize that the image they had created did not correspond to reality.
At first, it was not very noticeable and they even pretended that nothing was
happening, that it just seemed to them. But then they couldn't help but notice
that everything was wrong. He was not what they wanted him to be. And nothing
could change him, neither talking about what he should become, nor trying to
force him to submit to their will!
When you are
little, you depend on your family you cannot fight back and therefore you
endure everything they do to you.
He was
constantly put under "house arrest", but this arrest took place in
the library, and it was happiness for him, and not a punishment, as they
wanted. He opened the book and was transported to other worlds that opened to
him from the pages. He found freedom in books. He traveled for hours in other
worlds, acquired knowledge and experience given in books, and learned the surrounding
space.
They hired
teachers so that he had no time to think about rebelling against them. But he
loved to learn and gladly drew knowledge from those who gave him this
knowledge.
They never let
him go to school, believing that the world behind the wall would ruin him.
But he had
long ago penetrated that other world. They did not notice it, they missed it.
They thought that a little boy riding his bike through the fields around their
house, surrounded by a huge fence, would not be able to know that there was another
life. But he found out.
Prokhor! They
met then at the pond: little Kai with a mute question in his eyes turned to the
sky and such an overly serious teenager who saw the boy's eyes and felt his
loneliness. He was lonely too. But from that day on, they divided their
loneliness into two.
They did not
talk about the pain that was already in their souls. Rich, from a good family,
Kai, but with such huge and sad green eyes, and Prokhor, a teenager from an
ordinary family, where there was no father, only an eternally working mother,
whom he always saw tired.
Prokhor also
asked himself a question:
"Why? Why
does his mother hate him so much? Why then did she give birth to him, if his
whole existence was now so hateful to her? What for? Why tell him that she
works three jobs to feed him and put him on his feet. After all, if you love
someone, you do it for him. And if you don't love? Then you do it anyway and you
hate that person even more."
After all, it
was he who was to blame for such her life. It was his fault that his father
left when he had been still little. He just left to live with another family.
But Prokhor felt that it was because of him, and she knew it, and hatred for
him had already arisen in her soul. And now his mother had a broken life - this
was how she had spoken of herself to everyone who felt sorry for her. But what
was he to blame? It turned out in everything. It was he who broke her life with
his birth.
"How
strange," thought Prokhor, "a new life is being born, but it turns
out that everyone has already hated it. You live with a person who is dearest
to you, the closest on the whole earth, but gradually you begin to feel that
this one hates you. Your whole existence is unbearable to this person! "
The small
apartment in which he lived with his mother did not make it possible to exclude
communication, and therefore Prokhor more and more often began to disappear on
the street. This angered her even more. Now he was gradually turning into a
difficult teenager who got involved with a bad company, and that finally ruined
her life. It was a vicious circle. There was no way out of it. It was only
necessary to accept the reality of what had happened. And Prokhor accepted. He
loved his mother, the one he created in his dreams, sweet, caring, loving him.
He loved her with all his heart. And in real life, he calmly listened to the
next reproaches and painful words addressed to him and left where he was not
alone.
Then by the
pond, seeing a boy with eyes full of pain, he read in them a question that had
tormented his soul too:
"Why don't
they just love me, just because I exist?"
Prokhor did not
talk to him about this. He could not answer this question. But from that day
on, two souls found each other and the pain shared with the other was no longer
so strong. They stopped looking for an answer to their question. They just
began to live and enjoy life!
Prokhor
opened another world for Kai. The world outside the wall of his house. It
turned out to be cruel and adult. And in order to survive in it, he had to grow
up quickly and fight for a place in this world.
This did not
frighten him. Prokhor's company, to which the boy brought him, was one of the
same teenagers who were also simply not loved just because they were born and
lived. And it hardened their hearts.
Kai was under
the protection of Prokhor. He was much younger than them, although in
conversation and prudence they thought he was older. At first, they hated him
for having everything in this life, and then they accepted him, realizing that
he did not need all this. That, having everything in life, the most important
thing was taken from him - this was his freedom. For them, freedom was the most
important thing, and therefore they accepted Kai, and no one else dared to
throw an insulting word against him.
***
Once, returning
to the place of their "deployment", an abandoned basement, where
their small teenage gang equipped themselves a temporary shelter, a group of
guys, much older than them, from another gang came out to meet them.
Prokhor hid Kai
behind himself, telling him to flee from here when the fight started. The
forces were unequal. Prokhor's gang numbered ten people - another one was twice
as many. And they were well prepared. In their hands, there were sticks, metal
rods, bottles, and knives.
A fight broke
out.
It was then
that Kai first used his martial art in a real fight. Then, for the first time,
he felt the warm blood of his enemy on his hands. He managed to snatch the
stick out of the hands of the attacker, and he fought with it, using all kinds
of martial arts techniques that his teachers had taught him.
Prokhor and his
guys froze in amazement when, with another precise movement, he knocked the
bottle out of the opponent's hands and knocked him out with a stick to the
solar plexus. But he was still too young, and therefore he also got bit a lot.
He tasted his
blood in his mouth. This taste - the taste of metal - how often he would feel
it later in his life.
The fight
ended, or rather, the attackers did not expect such fierce resistance and
therefore began to retreat, picking up their guys and dissolving into the
darkness of the alleys.
Having kicked
the last two teenagers lying on the asphalt, Prokhor gave the command to leave.
Kai held on
with the last bit of strength. The whole body ached from the blows received,
the right hand became numb from such an overload. He spat blood from his broken
lips and wiped the dripping one from his nose with his sleeve. Prokhor walked
beside him, casting attentive glances over his shoulder at him.
Already going
down to the basement, he staggered and felt that the floor was leaving from
under his feet. Prokhor grabbed him, carried him in his arms to an old iron bed
in the corner, covered with a torn bedspread. One of the guys brought a roll of
toilet paper and, tearing off a larger piece, gave it to his hand to put it on
his nose, which was bleeding. Prokhor brought a towel soaked in water and wiped
his face. The guys picked ice from the freezer and, putting it in a bag, gave
it to Prokhor, who put ice on his nose.
Kai felt that
everyone was looking at him strangely, he understood that his behavior in a
fight, his mastery of fighting technique made such an impression on them. From
that moment on, their attitude towards him changed radically. Now they treated
him with a kind of awe. On the one hand, in their attitude, there was an almost
parental concern, because he was younger than them, and on the other hand,
respect as he was a cooler kid than they.
"Does it hurt?"
Prokhor asked carefully, bending over him.
"It's
okay," he smiled, although it was given to him with difficulty.
"You fight
in such a way! This is the first time I've seen this! Like in the movies!"
Prokhor spoke, not hiding his admiration, "Where did you learn this?"
"Father's
friend is Japanese, he lives in our house. I have been training since
childhood," then he became sad, "and my father also hires such
teachers especially for me. You remember I've told you that I have to become a
military man. That is why they teach me this."
Prokhor remembered
their conversation, when Kai briefly had told what his family expected from
him, and that he did not want this, and for this, he was rejected. Then Prokhor
did not ask him about the details, feeling that this was a very painful topic
for him and it was difficult for him to talk about it. Prokhor understood why
he had such sad eyes and why he was with them, and not with his family. And
now, having once again heard this from him, and most importantly, seeing him in
a fight, Prokhor realized how serious it was in his life.
"I haven't
asked you, but I want to understand," Prokhor looked into the eyes of his
friend, "it is important for me to understand this for myself, because you
are here, among us, and you are my friend, so I want to understand you. You've
said that your family wants you to become a military man, and as I can see,
their intentions are serious. Tell me why don't you want it?"
"I don't
want to kill!" he answered very clearly.
Now Prokhor saw
in the eyes of this boy an adult life position, which could not be changed by
anything or anyone.
"But they
will not leave you alone?"
"Yes, I
know. I will grow up and then I will be able to decide for myself how to live
and what to do!"
"You have
made a decision, I will be with you, we will think of something. When you grow
up, you will join my gang. Do you want to be with me?"
"Yes. I
have no one else but you."
Kai's eyes
glowed with sincerity.
Prokhor put his
hand on Kai's one and shook it.
"You are
not alone. We will always be together now."
Then he fell
asleep, the load and nervous stress from the first real fight in his life made
itself felt. Prokhor, covering him with his jacket and making sure that he was
sleeping soundly asleep, went to the guys who were preparing a festive dinner in
their makeshift kitchen.
The so-called
kitchen was located here, in another branch of the basement. There was an old
gas stove with a gas cylinder, a shabby washstand hung on the wall. Here the
guys brought the furniture they found in the trash heap, but the main value was
a huge long table at which almost everyone was placed. Benches, chairs, and
stools were around the table. Everything that was found in a more or less good
condition was brought here to their "home". In the center of the
table, there was an old armchair, this was Prokhor's seat. Nobody even thought
of sitting there. Prokhor, although he did not possess the eastern fighting
technique, but hit hard and concretely. And he was feared and respected. He was
their leader, who managed to unite them and lead them.
To the right of
Prokhor's chair, there was a chair that no one was occupying either - this was
Kai's place. Even the first time when Prokhor brought him to their gang. He put
this chair next to him and asked if anyone had any questions on his wish to see
Kai next to him. No one had any questions.
Prokhor
guarded his little friend, although he never made him exceptions or indulgences
in anything. He felt responsible for him, as for a younger brother, so he
always kept him by his side if they went to fight or to rob. Among the
members of his gang, he quickly figured out those who were dissatisfied with
such a decision and explained to them once and for all that his decision had to
be respected.
Now in this
kitchen, his guys were preparing dinner. After all, they had won! Nobody even
expected this. Seeing these adult boys in front of them, and even prepared for
battle, they realized that they would fight to the last, but they had no
chance. And here was Kai. Who would have thought! Now, opening the stew, stirring
buckwheat, and slicing bread, they heatedly discussed how he behaved in a
fight. Some even tried to imitate his fighting moves, but this only made the
others laugh.
Prokhor was
pleased with the realization of what his friend turned out to be. But even if
Kai today, as Prokhor told him, ran away when the battle began, it would not
matter for Prokhor. Their friendship would not have broken up. It was strange,
but Prokhor understood that Kai would never run away. Why did he understand
this? There was something in him that attracted Prokhor - this inner strength.
It was an incredible inner strength of mind. Therefore, Prokhor was with him.
He never made mistakes in people, even if he was still a little boy, but with
huge sad eyes.
They took out
vodka from the refrigerator. They have long behaved like adults, although they
were still children. Prokhor drank with everyone. They put hot food.
While eating
such delicious buckwheat porridge with stewed meat, Prokhor thought about Kai's
words: "I don't want to kill." But he had crossed this line long ago,
and he did not care. Although no, then when he realized that the man who had
been struggling in his arms had quieted down - he became afraid. It was very
scary. It was a couple of years ago. Then he just began to gather around him
those who were rejected by this world. They decided to rob the warehouse.
According to their calculations, there should have been no one there. But a
drunken man was sleeping inside. It was either a watchman or a bum who got
inside. It didn't matter. He saw them and began to shout. Rather, he just
screamed when Prokhor's knife entered his stomach. Prokhor struck several
times. The body went limp, short death cramps - and everything was over.
Prokhor felt warm blood on his hands. He dried his hands. He looked at the pale
faces of the guys standing around him. From that moment on, he became their
true leader. It was like a rite of passage - a sacrifice. Now no one dared even
think badly of him or contradict him. Those who saw it with their own eyes told
the boys who were newly arriving at them about Prokhor, who even without
flinching had ripped open the man's stomach.
"I wonder
how Kai will react to this when he finds out that I've killed a man?"
But that was
not the point. He would kill if the situation called for it. It didn't bother
him. This was life. And he accepted it for what it was. He needed to tell Kai
about it somehow. After all, he was his friend, and there should be no secrets
between them.
***
In today's
fight, Kai suffered the most. The rest escaped with bruises and minor injuries.
And not surprising - after all, he was in the thick of the battle.
An hour later
he left the bedroom.
His body was
recovering quickly. And now this hour of sleep restored his strength. Although
everything hurt, he felt good overall.
Everyone was
delighted with him. They began to shake hands and pat on the shoulder. They
immediately pounced on with questions and requests to teach them how to fight
in the same way.
Prokhor banged
on the table, everyone was quiet. He motioned for him to sit next to, in his
place. Everyone parted in front of him, letting him pass to the chair. One of
the guys quickly ran away and brought him food.
"How are
you?" Prokhor looked at him carefully, trying to make sure of his health.
"It's
okay."
"Exactly?
You got the most."
"I am not
only taught the art of combat. There are also techniques for protection and
recovery. It is important to know and be able to apply. Therefore, everything
is really normal."
"Well,
you're cool! You've passed the rite of passage into our gang - you've shown
yourself in the real case. Now you will always be with me - you will be my
deputy."
Prokhor held
out his hand to him. They shook hands. This was the recognition of Kai by
Prokhor in front of everyone. Now Prokhor had officially put him in second
place after himself in their gang. And everyone understood this.
After that, the
guys could not resist and inundated him with questions about how he fought like
that. He ate and answered. Prokhor, being already full and lounging in his
"royal" chair, looked at all this.
"What time
do you need to get home today?" Prokhor's eyes sparkled slyly.
"Today I
can do it late. My parents left for the reception at the Kremlin, they will
return very late, and those who are in the house will not betray what time I
have arrived."
"It's good
that there is time," Prokhor sly smiled, "guys, bring a clean glass
and pour vodka."
Prokhor put a
glass of vodka in front of Kai.
"It's time
for you to become an adult. And then you fight better than us, and you haven't
even tried vodka. Is it so?" Prokhor looked into the eyes of his friend.
"No. Have
not tried it."
"Then
drink."
Kai looked at
Prokhor. He trusted him. This was his friend. If Prokhor said, then he must
drink vodka.
He drank. His
breath caught. But then a strange warmth poured over his body. The pain from
the blows gradually melted into this warmth. He no longer felt pain, he felt
good, it was good and easy. And the soul was easy. Everything that had
tormented and tortured him from the inside went away and remained somewhere far
away.
Prokhor watched
him, saw, and understood what the boy was feeling. He bent down to Kai and, so
that no one could hear, asked:
"Doesn't
it hurt now?" he understood that everything hurt him after today's fight.
He admired how courageously his friend endured pain and did not complain. This
glass of vodka was now the only thing that Prokhor could do for him to numb the
pain, even if for a few hours.
"No,"
Kai replied in surprise, "I'm fine now."
The guys
shouted at him to have another drink. But Prokhor covered the glass with his
hand and said that it was enough for the first time.
He spent that
evening in a state of strange euphoria. Late at night, when the alcohol had
practically disappeared, Prokhor took several guys with him and went to see him
off.
Since that
time, Prokhor no longer allowed Kai to drink vodka. Only on New Year's, which
they celebrated later than the holiday itself, Prokhor poured and allowed him
to drink a glass of champagne. After this glass, everyone "lost" him.
He woke up in the morning, when, finally, Prokhor managed to wake him up to
send him home.
So he grew up.
Then there were many more fights and not entirely correct affairs, to which he
went with Prokhor. Although Prokhor did not take him for serious cases. He
didn't want to involve the boy, and he was worried about Kai.
***
Being a
teenager, he came into their flat. That basement had long been abandoned by
them. And that house was also demolished. Now their gang was based in the flat.
It was a huge communal apartment in the center of old
When he was
here, Kai was always amazed at new faces and strange personalities that one
could encounter in the hallway of this apartment and then never see them again.
Who were they, where were they from and why were they here? Probably no one
would have answered this question to him.
Their rooms
were comfortable. There was also a table in the center, but now it was more
decent than the one in the basement. There were also chairs around the table.
The invariable royal chair of Prokhor was in the center and a little simpler -
Kai's one - to the right of Prokhor.
During this
time Prokhor turned into a stocky, broad-shouldered youth with straight,
short-cropped brown hair, regular features with the first signs of a mustache
and beard, which he began to shave off, and penetrating tiger eyes. Yes, if not
for these predator's eyes, he could be called a very nice young man. But this
strange look with yellow sparks frightened those looking at him and made his
face cruel. There were tightly compressed lips, on which a smile rarely showed,
and the unyielding character of the undisputed leader. They were afraid of him.
They respected, but more were afraid.
During this
brief period of his adolescence-to-youth transition, he had two more occasions
when he had killed. And this left an imprint on him: although he was young, his
soul had long ago become stale, and this was imprinted on his appearance.
One evening,
still in their basement, Prokhor called Kai into his so-called office, into a
recess in the wall, closed by a curtain, where there was a small table, a
couple of chairs, and an armchair for Prokhor. Here he usually planned secret
operations, not for everyone, and dealt with each member of his gang separately,
if the situation required.
Kai sat across
from him at the table and waited for what he would say.
"You know,
I've killed a man," Prokhor said simply, peering into his face, looking
for condemnation or self-loathing in him after what he had said.
Kai was silent
for a long time. Then he got up, walked over to Prokhor, who was sitting in an
armchair and hugged him by the shoulders.
"I'm so
sorry that you have such a life where you have to do it. You are so good, so
kind. I'll always be with you," said he and returned to his chair.
That moment
Prokhor was shocked to the core. He expected anything his friend would say upon
learning about it. But this still boy just hugged him by the shoulders and
absorbed his pain into himself. But even Prokhor did not allow himself to think
about it. He did not allow himself to admit that after that his soul was
languishing with the pain of what he had done. He was moved by the fact that
now he was understood and accepted as he was.
After that,
Prokhor told his friend everything, and Kai also told him everything about his
life there, behind the wall in his house.
His life was
still the same, but with an even greater tightening of control over himself.
After his parents began to find him regularly with a broken face and torn
clothes, they began to put him under house arrest more often. But this only
added to his knowledge, since he did not waste time. He studied. And at the
same time, his desire to find freedom from them grew every day.
Now, being a
teenager and entering their apartment, Kai could already afford not to come
home for the night. He could stay here overnight or hang out here for several
days. Returning home, he listened distantly to lectures about his behavior. But
now it didn't bother him, he didn't care what they said to him. This was
followed by another punishment in the form of arrest for several days.
Sometimes he sat out these days at home if his studies required it, and
sometimes he ran away - and no one and nothing could stop him.
Realizing that
their son had contacted a bad company, his parents decided to send him to
It was
isolation, but not for him.
Being met from
the train, he was taken by car for a long time through the
"I want
to fly with them over this steppe!" he decided firmly, seeing the
galloping horses.
The
sand of time. Volume 2. "The Book of Flame"
Prologue
A few years
earlier ...
The plane was
falling. He felt it with every cell of his body, as if he were one with this
wounded machine, fighting in the air for its life. Such wounds inflicted on a
huge beast flying through space were incompatible with life. Kai understood
that. But he fought, fought to the last.
Fuel leaked
from the holes, leaving the huge body drained of blood. The last growls,
coughs, groans, and sobs came from a motor beating in death throes.
"Don't
die, my friend in battle! You've saved me in this battle, save me now! Do not
take with you to this endless blue sky! I want to live so much!"
Kai did the
incredible - they were still flying. He kept the machine in the air with the
last of his strength. Then he began to descend, realizing that there was no
other way out. Beneath them, there was a desert. An endless eternal desert of
sand. They couldn't cross it.
The machine
was dying. It was dying in his arms. A few more moments - and he would hear the
last death whine of the motor - then the end would come for both of them.
It was going
down. Now the main thing was to have time to touch the ground, or rather the
sand before the engines were turned off.
The earth was
rapidly approaching. The machine groaned, vibrated in its death throes.
"Darling,
be patient! A little more!"
A tail of smoke
lay behind them. Flames flared up, licking the metal, and then extinguished,
blown out by air currents.
The plane, like
a shooting star, left a trail of smoke in the blue sky.
The surrounding
space looked indifferently at the struggle for the lives of two - a huge plane
and a man in it.
The plane
touched the sand and came into contact with this surface at great speed. They
were covered from above by the sand wave lifted by the plane. There was a
rumble in his ears. Kai was thrown from side to side in the chair he was
strapped to. The plane began to roll over. He heard the groans of twisted metal
in his ears - the final scream of a dying machine. And then everything
disappeared. Rather, it disappeared for him. He lost consciousness, lost touch
with reality, time dissolved for him ...
The plane was
moving forward by inertia for some time, but, getting deeper into the sand
dunes, it stopped and froze. The tons of sand he had lifted into the air began
to return back. This sand, it saved them, it extinguished the flame, strangled
the fire, not allowing it to flare up with renewed vigor. There was no
ammunition on the plane, they were all used up in the battle. The remaining
fuel leaked out into the air. The dead bomber lay in the sand under the arch of
the sky, indifferent to everything that was happening.
Silence
reigned in the desert. Perfect silence, the silence of dead space.
***
Kai felt cold.
There was an impenetrable void all around.
"That's
all ... This is the end!"
No! Everything
would not end so easily in his life!
He unbuckled
the straps holding him in the chair and fell out of it, rolling to the door.
The floor was now tilted at a steep angle as the plane was lying on its side.
For a long
time, he tried to get out of this black vacuum around him. Bumping into objects
with hands, he remembered what it was and where it was located, and so gradually
he moved towards the exit.
He felt no
pain, he felt fear. Fear of the darkness around and the fear of staying in it -
in this darkness - forever. Therefore, he crawled, clung to objects, but did
not stop, just to see at least a spark of light.
All the wiring
was shorted from impact and damage, the backup bulbs did not light either.
There was nothing at hand that could give even a spark of light, not even his
lighter - he did not take it, he forgot it at the headquarters ...
The fear
increased due to the silence around. Only his breathing and the rustle of his
movement, and then silence. It enveloped from all sides.
"How
strange ..." he managed to open the side door with almost no effort. The
cold air hit his face. He stepped forward and fell to the sand, then slowly
rolled onto his back.
Above him
stretched a huge vault of the night sky. There were myriads of stars, the Milky
Way, points of movement of satellites, and flashes of lights of flying
aircraft. The southern sky - there is nothing more beautiful than it. He froze,
mesmerized by this beauty.
He did not know
how much time had passed. Now the time became unimportant for him. Time is
important to those who live among people. People have invented time to
subjugate the space around, but it has turned out the other way around. Space
became a time, a short time of their life. Here, in a space without people,
there was no time, there was nothing, only sand and a huge night sky going into
infinity.
It's cold in
the desert at night. This coldness had a healing effect on Kai. His body soaked
up the cold, and the pain from the blows gradually faded away. Then he realized
that he was starting to freeze. Then he crawled back into the dead car and
closed the door. A gloomy vacuum of darkness thickened around him. But now it
didn't scare him. Closing his eyes, he saw the stars in the night sky. He is
not alone; he is only a grain of sand among a myriad of stars. A small star
that fell from the sky into this desert ...
***
He woke up from
the heat. He seemed to be inhaling hot sand. Kai crawled to the door and opened
it. The bright light blinded, and the heat of the hot air swallowed him into
its embrace. When his eyes got used to the light, he got out of the plane and
looked around.
On the sand,
half-buried, lay a huge military bomber. Small parts of it were scattered
during its braking. But, surprisingly, the plane was practically not injured,
although it could fly to pieces. Now the sand of the desert was gently covering
its dead body with its soft veil. Not completely yet. But soon the desert would
swallow it into arms and give it an eternity of oblivion in this sand.
And the
desert would give him eternity.
How long would
he live here? He knew that inside the plane there was a small supply of water
and maybe something from a dry ration. Later, he would go looking for anything
that would prolong his life.
And then, what
would happen next ...
There was a
desert around. He roughly knew the square of his fall. There was nothing and no
one here. No one was ever here.
Should he
collect everything and go ahead? This is what fools do. The desert in a couple
of days would kill him with the heat of the day and the cold at night. There
was a shadow from the plane here, where he could wait out the heat and the
plane itself, where he could flee from the night cold.
"Thank
you!" Kai put his hand on the metal of the side, "You've died, you
can no longer be saved. Your injuries are fatal. No one can bring you back to
life. So sleep here, my friend, who has fought to the last for my life. And now
I will stay with you. I will be here by your side, I will guard your peace,
your sleep until I fall asleep myself. And then only the sky will know where our
lives have disappeared ... "
But now he was
still alive. And life was wonderful. How beautiful the desert is! This is
majestic infinity. It is a sea of sand with soft waves extending beyond the
horizon. It is the blue of the endless sky. It was such a bright sunny day.
Kai sat on
the sand in the shadow of the plane, leaning his back against its side, and
recalled his such short life ...
Prologue Love - what is it? Does it exist on earth? Or is it just self-deception, the fruit of an inflamed mind, and the justifica...